I've recently rediscovered, in the course of my procrastinations, some old online comics that I used to read. I would just like to say, for the record, that I still think this is funny.

Unattainable Men I Have Had Crushes On

Almanzo Wilder (1991-1993) (Dead, Portrayed in the "Little House" Books)

Fox Mulder (1997-1999) (Fictional Character, Slightly Insane)

Aragorn, Son of Arathorn (Fictional Character) (?-present)

That Waiter At The Cafe on West Portal (2003-present)

Peter Abelard (2005) (Dead and Castrated)

So far, to avoid working on midterms, I have:

Roasted and carved a 6 lb ham
Baked a pumpkin pie from scratch
Shaved my legs
Sung along to Dar Williams while whipping cream by hand
Attended the University Orchestra Halloween Concert
Sat quietly with Jack on my lap while he had dreams about nursing
Written this post

Lost in Translation

Saturday at the Co-op they played "King of Pain" on the radio--which, of course, reminded me of Nick's translation and performance thereof. Here is a similar project, by way of Got Medieval--but the language is Middle English, not Latin.

We are at T-25 hours to the Old English midterm. Help, help!

Alice's Top Five Most-Often-Used Punctuation Marks

5. period ( . )

4. comma ( , )

3. ellipsis ( ... )

2. em-dash (--)

1. parenthesis ( () )

No Such Thing As Coincidence

Allow me to enumerate the ways in which the University of Chicago resembles a Jane Austen novel:

Persuasion: has the steps of the Cobb

University of Chicago: has the stairs of Cobb

Pride and Prejudice: One smart, arrogant young man

University of Chicago: Many smart, arrogant young men

Northanger Abbey: Gothic Buildings

University of Chicago: Neo-Gothic Bulidings

It all goes to show that some snowy day I'm going to fall down the stairs in Cobb and end up as screwy as Lucinda Musgrove.

Sometimes you feel like a biohazard...

You know. Those times when your sign of peace is not so much "Peace be with you" as it is "sorry, I'm sick, can't shake hands."

Erin is here! Yesterday was hard on her--she had an intense interview, but was offered a temporary position (with the possibility of it being permanent). She's overwhelmed by the way in which things have landed in her lap--even housing, as Dianna has said that she can stay with us until Christmas.

This is very good for me, as Dianna was having such a hard time leaving Robert behind in San Antonio, she has decided to stay at least another week-- probably two. Having Erin as a housemate will keep me from going completely batty from lonliness. She is also suffering from a bad virus, so we have been sniffling and drinking tea together.

Living with Erin... I can't find a way to describe it. The only person I can compare her to, in her simple dependance on God, is St. Therese. Everything that happens is a reminder of God's grace and Mary's motherly love. She is gracefully inspiring, and a necessary reminder that we depend on God for everything--as He takes care of the lillies and the sparrows, so He will take care of us-- as shown by the way He is currently providing for her.

Midterms have totally snuck up on me. I don't know how they did it, but all of a sudden fourth week is over and I have three midterms next week. I'm enjoying the quarter so much, I want it to slow down.

This weekend's reading: Heloise and Abelard.

By Way of The Holy Whapping

There Go the Altar Rails

I think I'm pro-Vatican II (I am in favor of the laity, being a member therof) and anti-"the spirit of Vatican II". But the phrase "modernized mass" give me a headache. I know what they mean, but the prayer of the Mass is both in and outside time. It can't be "modernized"- it is timeless, and yet eternally connected to an act sometime in the twenties, AD.

Part of the role of the rite is to make that clear to our weak, human perceptions.

I'm sorry I'm a poet, not a theologian. I'm sure my description will be smashed by those very Whapsters. (Or Andy P.) My only defense is to direct you to everyone's favorite, St. Tommy A.

In other news: I'm not in Old English this morning because I'm trying my hardest to get un-sick before Erin shows up. I'll go to War in the Middle Ages this afternoon, but I'm taking a lazy, invalid morning, during which I will read about the Knights Templar.

In other other news: I don't think I stressed this enough. Go read Abbie the Cat has a Posse. It is animal-at-keyboard in the best tradition of the life and times of archy and mehitabel. Even people who are not cat people should enjoy his descriptions of feline depravity-- although those with an intimate knowledge of cats will get a kick out of recognizing their moods and motivations. I confess that the most recent post made me cry-- not because it was about a cat, but because it was from the point of view of a cat, writing about a cat, which made it human (and it was beautifully done). This blog is poetry. With pirates. As Archy typed, "expression is the need of my soul".

In other other other news: I keep forgetting to post this: Happy (Rather Belated) Feast of St. Luke the Evangelist! Is it too dorky to have a favorite synoptic gospel?

In other other other other news: I forgot.

I Tripped on His Tail, Too.

So there's this Music Professor who parks his dog in the 3rd Floor Goodspeed hallway. Really sweet dog, but the only one I've ever seen that had a double chin.

Bits & Pieces

She's right, you know.

Some more bad ideas for facebook groups:

Recovering Athiests
I Still Think Squirrels Are Cute
So He's The President. Can We Stop Arguing About Whether He's "Mine" or Not?
The Reg Stacks Tried to Eat My Soul
I Wish I Lived in Regency England


Have I mentioned yet that Jack (the kitten, for those of you who did not clip-n-keep the previous clip-n-keep section) has demonstrated a disturbing proclivity for tea? I drink really bitter (really, too bitter for me) British tea, but he'll go for it every time. I've never had a cat who was that desperate for milk.

So. Imagine a 14-week-old kitten on a caffeine high. I couldn't tell the difference, until I noticed that he was shaking.

Some more Whappers came to the Calvert Oktoberfest last Sunday. Emily and I enjoyed making fun of Dan (Rober) together. It was hard to get to know Matt, as he spent most of the time sending text messages in regards to his fantasy football team.

People With Whom I Need to Have Tea/Tasty Treat of Choice, once my throat is up to conversation again:
Veronica
Dan (Worthen)
Meg
Leah

If you are one of these people, I still love you. I'm just, you know, sick.

So I went to the OCF bananna bread baking party Sunday night. By the time I arrived, the bread was in the oven and they were sitting around watching Fawlty Towers. A Word to the Wise: Fawlty Towers is bad for your Latin Homework.

So you tell people that you're sick with a sore throat and cough, and all of a sudden they want to call you on the phone to talk to you-- and they almost invariably call when you're asleep. Therefore: please send any well-wishes by e-mail.

Final thought, related to the above list of Facebook groups. Anytime I mention that it would be interesting to live in a historical period, from Ancient Rome, to the Middle Ages, to the Victorian Era, someone invariably says, "but...you could die in childbirth!" It's not that I have dramatically narrow hips or anything. Yes, it was risky then...but most women didn't. That's how humanity survied Ancient Rome/The Middle Ages/The Victorian Era. Dianna would link this repeated response to our overconfidence in modern medicine, especially modern childbirth. Maybe when she gets back I'll ask her to write a guest post on the history of childbirth. But then, mostly boys read this blog, so maybe not.

I Feel Love I Feel Love I Feel Love

Famous Last Words: "Veronica. I live with toddlers. If I catch anything, it isn't going to be from you."

So I'm sick, which makes procrastinating okay. Yay. I went to the SCC, because it's in my chest and I didn't want to risk a bronchial infection, with my asthma and everything. They told me that I had a "viral syndrome", which means that they don't know what I have, but they aren't going to give me antibiotics, and told me to take lots of fluids, many naps, and some decongestants. Basically, stuff my mother could have told me. To comfort myself, I bought a new U of C sweatshirt (to make hanging out in pajamas seem more attractive), the current issue of The New Yorker, and a Terry Pratchett novel. Maggie braved the animals to make me chicken soup and tea.

Overall, however, it has been a week of pleasant surprises: a Halloween care package from Mr. & Mrs. LaVictoire, flowers from Patrick, a postcard from Josie, and a name-day phone call from Sukie. (Mrs. Lawler told me to "eat extra ice cream". I told her I needed no encouragement.) Erin is coming out for a job interview. The Lumen Christi Eucharist of the Saints lecture kicked theological ass--and was a nice way to spend a Saturday with Da Rober, Casey, Jakob, and Stephanie. It was also the feast of St. Teresa of Avila. To celebrate, I pre-ordered myself a copy of the Compendium of the Catechism on Amazon.

I've found some delightful blogs that I would like to share: Got Medieval and Abbie the Cat has a Posse.

Today's OE Quote: Translating the Flogging of St. Edmund
James: and they beat him with...um...
CVN: now, what are swipums?
James: brooms?

For the record, swipum = whips

Extremely Cool

Ian! Look!

Four Facebook Groups I Should Probably Not Start

I Have a Hopeless Crush on Danny Wasserman
You know you want to date a man who laughs like that.
Officers:
Calvert Liason: Alice
Hitchcock Liason: Meg
Fellow RA: Carolyn

Engaged Women Upholding the Patriarchy
In a (very) long-term relationship? Sick of weird looks from kids in your Gender Studies class? Certain that "feminist" doesn't mean "man-hating"? So are we.
Officers:
The Newlywed: Rue
Feminist in Love: Sarah
Companion in Crime: Alice

Some Day My Aelthling Will Come
All things Anglo-Saxon
Officers:
The English Nerd: Veronica
Knight in White Polo Shirts: Jakob
Welshie: Alice
Actually Gets This Stuff: Jonah
Waiting for Her Rohirrim: Tera

Latin Mass All The Way
Have you ever had the Regina Caeli stuck in your head? Does Domine, non sum dignum just sound more penitential to you? Have you ever parsed a psalm? Welcome home.
Officers:
Choir Leader: Veronica
Chestertonian Convert: Alice
Comfort for the Orthodox: Ben
Altar Servers: Greg & Dewey
Token Protestants: Jakob & Caitrin
Provider of Bombast: Dan
Flustered Apologist: Patrick
Patron Saint: St. Gaspar del Bufalo
Altar Candles: 51% Beeswax


I can quit anytime I want...

Other Marriageable Young Men...

"An iron is a poor substitute for a girlfriend." - Jakob

What the OED Won't Tell You...

"Orders have charisms. Charismatics have... tambourines."

Well, Finally...

Almost two years behind the times: I finally got myself on The Facebook. Do with it what you will.

Why did David have to be on it? Although I see, in keeping with his Senior page, he left no picture.

If you have a more flattering picture of me, let me know.

Oh, and ignore my aesthetic depression earlier. I'm not going apostate any time soon.

I feel like Calvert House is driving me into schism.

Haven't decided yet on Orthodox or SSPX.

Maybe some Hot Chocolate will make me feel better.

I don't want to talk about it.

"A Vestment Emergency...

...call the Episcopalians!"

- Dan, of Shrine of the Holy Whapping

Beating the DMV

If a blog is a way of getting out on the internet and announcing "I'm alive!", I've been doing a very poor job of it recently. Here, then, is the requisite update.

I. Clip-n-Keep Section: A Cast of Characters

Robert is a classics graduate student at the University of Chicago. He's one of Dawn's closest friends, and the father of the family I'm living with this year. He's a smart man, with wide-ranging interests, who (with his family) is in the process of converting to Eastern Orthodoxy. He's spending this quarter in San Antonio as a visiting professor at Trinity college.

Dianna is Robert's wife, and my 'landlady'. She teaches Bradley Method natural childbirth classes and works as a Doula. She's also in charge of the house and is homeschooling her daughters. I like her a great deal, and admire her parenting (especially as she's alone this quarter). I'm enjoying living with her.

Grace is five (and a half). She likes her ballet class, being read to, drawing, horses, pretty clothes and shoes, and bossing around her younger sister.

Ada is three. She's even more energetic than Grace, and has a very active imagination--but is still young enough to crawl into your lap to cuddle when she wants to be "loved on". She's having some temper tantrums and crying spells now, but she's trying hard to be good.

Dora is a Gordon Setter Mix. She's a beautiful big dog with a too-human personality (she sighs when she's lonely). We had a bit of a scare last week--she was having some kidney trouble-- but she seems to be feeling much better.

Winnie is the little dog, who likes to bark and play and nose around. She's pretty, with a classic hound coloring (like a mini Hektor, if you've seen the Compton House mascot), but is driving everyone nuts with her bad behavior.

Agatha is a Calico cat who spends much of her time outdoors. I love Agatha's company, but she keeps to herself. It is an honor when she shows up at the foot of the bed.

Jack ("Jackie for short," say the girls, which I think is hilarious) is a twelve-week-old black kitten with white spots. He's too cute for his own good, especially when he tries to play with the dogs by batting at Dora's tail.

II. What I'm Doing: Classes

Latin 101 with Phil Venticinque: Phil has been at the U of C for nine years, and it shows. He's classic Chicago, with a dorky sense of humor ("I come bearing chairs, like Caesar into Gaul"), a sound knowledge of both history and latin, and an addiction to Tab.

Medieval Women's Religious Writing, with Lucy Pick: Too much Gender, not enough Studies. I love Lucy Pick, so I'm trying hard to give this class a chance, but it's difficult.

Old English with Christina Von Nolken: I'm not sure how the language is going to be--so far we have been very technical, with the history and philology of Old English, but CVN is great. I can see why Emily and Margaret loved her so much.

War in the Middle Ages, with Rachel Fulton: This class kicks ass, despite the final project, which is to write a narrative. (Miller suggests, "He fell in the mud...I ran him through with my spear.")

III. What I'm Doing: Not Classes

Working as a Sacristan. Rosary at Calvert every day. Laundry. Dishes. Playing with Grace and Ada. Maravillas with Amanda. Chai with Charlotte. Studying with Maggie. Talking to Patrick. Talking to Patrick some more. Staring out the Calvert House window. Raiding the Calvert Kitchen. Talking to Patrick even more. Drinking tea. Procrastinating on writing a blog post. Drinking more tea. Not studying with Maggie. Talking to Patrick yet again. Making a tea-enduced bathroom run. Lunch with Tom. Writing to Grandma. Playing with Jack. Eating dinner. Talking to Patrick.

IV. Blogging Fame by Association

One new student at the Div School this year is Dan (n.b: the last thing I need in my life is yet another man named Daniel), of Shrine of the Holy Whapping. I don't actually read the blog that often, because I have the attention span of a fruit fly, but I was pretty much rendered speechless when he told me that he'd started it. He gave me a ride to mass on Saturday Morning (Feast of St. Therese), which I greatly appreciated.

V. Breckie of the week.

I love Geoff's Blog. It's probably my current favorite thing on the internet.